Tuesday, January 29, 2013

Graduation or salvation

From the University of Jordan. Unprofessional employees smoking everywhere underneath the No Smoking signs. Rudeness and dismissing inquirers are the standard behavior. I don't know where all this come from. The registration office doesn't care how long I wait, how long I walk from this place or the other repeatedly. Selfishness is at an extreme here and I got used to it unfortunately, I'm surprised that I am not surprised and I remind myself that I need to ignore it.

People who live under the fact that they are objects in a system in which they have no control and as thus behave as if the worst-case scenario that defines the shape of the community isn't worth the effort of making tiny improvements since 'a little white dot doesn't show on a black page' is one of the dominant negative quotes people embrace.

On another front, I am reminded of the importance of leaving the University, and the country. I met great people here but it's time for me to respond to the fact that my efficiency, my productivity and my spirit has been hindered by the values and lack thereof of this community. I no longer want to be a hero whose goal is to save people who don't want to be saved. I'll dedicate my leadership efforts into something of a higher nature than just telling people to stand for what's right, which is a very basic intuitive thing that in a dogmatic society like Jordan, people easily forget.

The humanity of the human life, which is what I have and of which I am reminded constantly with every heart beat and every wandering thought, is beyond the primitive societal struggles of imprisoned people jailed by there refusal to make amendments that facilitate communal progress. It's a spirit and changing it need more than a software developer. We need more cheerleaders, to cheer up who do good.

I am taking a rest before making yet another trip to the registration office to get my certificate. I hope I will be able to get everything done today, to happily say good bye to this place and all its good, bad and wonder.

I am embracing a new life, I had embraced a new life since a long time actually, but now it's done. It's here not as a wish, but as a reality that empowers me to take more solid steps towards what I want from life and I want a lot.

Edit:

Another 5 minutes. I don't want to reach the employee again too early; he said it'll take 5 minutes for the data to propagate the system. It's nothing compared to the time I wasted here running from place to place trying to add courses, or know where my classes are (they used to change them from what is reported in the class schedule almost everytime), struggling to create schedule (finding classes) and then have them cancelled almost every semester, and it goes on and on.

There are absolutely lots of things I'm going to miss here. Lots of cute girls is one of them, unfortunately, most of them are until-marriage virgins. I'll miss my naivety and the simplicity of my behavior at times; I was freerer. Time to unlearn, relearn and then learn.

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